Daddys Girls Guilty as Hell

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Your faith was strong but you needed proof You saw her bathing on the roof Her beauty and the moonlight overthrew you She tied you to her kitchen chair She broke your throne and she cut your hair And from your lips she drew the Hallelujah. But remember when I moved in you And the holy dove was moving too And every breath we drew was Hallelujah. I just wanna make you smile. Cause I fell just like all the rest. I was too broke down to fly. Take a chance on me Daddy, this may be all we got. The night be black and the road may be long.

Your voice may crack and it all sounds wrong. Now taste those tears. It seems your luck has all been shot. No use asking why. But sooner or later we all have to try. All You Ever. Everything you ever tried to be was just a fantasy. All you ever needed was someone to tell you you were right.

And all you ever wanted was to put off some of your own light. There you are, singing Desperado in the car at night. There you are, with everybody looking up at you. Me Oh My. I had a baby but the good lord took her. She was an angel but her wings were crooked. I guess he figured he could love her better than me. Some girls marry and some girls wait.

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Some do better without that ball and chain…singing… Oh me, Oh my tell me it gets easier with time. With the way you drink and the brows you raise. You can bet they wonder how the bills get paid, when you dance all night and you sleep all day. Girl when you gonna settle down, and make your mama proud? Oh no, not now. They say the good times go too fast. Edge of the Frame. And you make a scene, you get your picture in a magazine. Why you make a beggar out of your best friend.

Oh heaven knows, you love to dress me up in ribbons and bows. I go to get myself a coffee and everybody stares at me. They know you treat me awful mean. When the mailman brings the letters he tries to talk some sense to me. I tell myself over and over I should be getting out of here. So listen Honey and believe me, cause this is all I got to say… Anyone would have to be a fool to love you like I do. Hearts of Men. He was forty-six with the wife and the kids and the job with the suit and the tie.

Oh but I, I wanna be your child again.

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I wanna remember when everything was new. And damn this pride that lives inside the hearts of men. I wanna be whole again. Oh and I. I passed a truck filled with old street signs, it seemed like one of them was mine, a long long time ago, before I knew you Caroline. Now the bus is leaving, wish I could stay.

Oh Carolina, oh Carolina. You know I love you in my way. We sat out on the front steps and shared a cigarette. We watched the neighbors go to bed. They fed the dog and shut the lights, and we were on our own again. But as the sun began to rise. We were running out of shadows to hide ourselves behind. Would you love me one more time, before we raise the blinds and make the bed?

Growing Up Without a Dad Shapes Who You Are

My little train wreck. Your eyes are smiling but your cheeks are wet. We fell asleep just like we used to, legs all tangled in the sheets. I know you dreamed that bus to Houston, heard you talking in your sleep.

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I would have held you all day long. But when I opened up my eyes you were already gone. So I lost that battle. And today, she eats terribly. That is NOT my fault. I tried. I actually have very few guilts and regrets left outside of fatherhood, for that matter. Those are mostly meaningless.

I was an amazing dad between the hours of noon and pm daily. Why noon? Because daddy was hungover and had to sleep in. I left her to get her own breakfast and play by herself for the first three or four hours of her day. And this was when she was only four or five years old. I rationalized it because I was so freaking amazing the rest of the day. And I was doing this parenting thing alone.

Just stupid, ridiculous freaking rationalizations. But I have to. I have to cleanse that part of me somehow.

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But I will never look back on the experience of raising her alone with pride, and that makes me enduringly sad. The only thing I can do for her now is to make my relationship with her something SHE takes pride in, and hopefully the pain in my heart with slowly evaporate. There are a couple of minor guilts I have to wash away today, as well.

I have guilt knowing that she got the worst of me for her childhood, but her brother and sister are getting me sober. This new baby girl even gets me sober from day ONE!! But there is guilt there. I will forever hate the man that allowed alcohol and tobacco to hold importance over his own daughter for twelve damn years. I know all the trite sayings about regret and guilt. They do not allow a person to live in THIS moment.

I know that. And to be honest, I seldom do. But when it hits me, I feel like shit. My daughter does not hate me for this. Somehow, through my honesty and contrition, she seems to understand. Forgiveness, for her, was never in question. Not once has she made me feel guilty for being an addict the first twelve years of her life. I hope she grows up with that kind of understanding heart. I hope she is accepting of people trying to better themselves, even when their mistakes are disgusting.

And I think she will be. Somehow I raised her to be that way. In that, I succeeded. I regret I waited until the ninth month of his life to get sober. Family members have no right to get involved directly in politics on the strength of the father. If you dig into our political history there have always been instances where family members take the authority into their hands. This is non other than abuse of power. This must acome to an end.

Daddy's Girl's Guilty As Hell - Susan Ni Rahilly - Google книги

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